April 29 Nats Precap

The first in an occasional series where I write a recap of the Nats game before it happens


In spite of the Nationals inability to meet basic competencies such as “Don’t hit into double plays” and “ put the ball in play with the base loaded” manager Davey Martinez was upbeat after the teams 3 run loss in which he used all his relievers to cover a combined 3.1 innings of work, during which the Nats turned a minor lead into an extended loss.

“Sure, the results aren’t there and everyone on the team is showing a remarkable lack of baserunning discipline, plate discipline, ability to hit in any situation with runners in scoring position, and our relievers appear to be exhibiting some confusion about what exactly a a strike is , but other than that we’re fine.” Martinez declined to elaborate on whether it would be possible to achieve the roughly .800 winning percentage that would be needed to catch up with the mets.

“I was really appreciative of how Sammy Solis came in today and threw nothing but meatballs in the strike zone, he really showed some grit by making AJ Pollock and Paul Goldschmidt get tuckered out running the bases as they slapped triples left and right ” Martinez said in reference to his favorite reliever pitching for a third straight day in a high leverage situation that he has in no way earned.

“Sure the Mets are a million games ahead of us in May but that in no way changes our mindset: We have to alienate all present and future free agents in order to make sure the Lerner’s get the team they deserve.”

Anthony Rendon , who came off the disabled list only to go 0-4 with 3 strikeouts and grounding into a bases loaded triple play, could be heard yelling “IF YOU KNEW IT WAS BROKEN LAST WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME TILL NOW.” A Nationals spokesperson stated that Rendon was day to day and available off the bench versus Pittsburgh on monday.

Adam Eaton was seen walking around with leeches on his leg and stated that it was some new age thing the trainer told him would work.

Gio Gonzalez, who threw 135 pitches in 5.2 innings , expressed irritation that he was pulled after throwing a series of meatballs.

“Yeah, I know that the idea of a clean inning terrifies me , but Davey was still wrong to not trust me to do the same thing I always do in a critical situation: Shit the bed.”

The Nationals prepare to face Pittsburgh on Monday, where they will almost certainly struggle to win more than a game in.

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